Protect Children from Abuse, Heal Survivors

As published in the Metropolis newspaper.

If it was me, I would have told someone that I was being touched. 

I don’t know why she waited all of those years to say something. She’s lying. She is looking for attention, are you still talking about this? These are just a few statements that survivors have to deal with from outsiders that have never been in our position. 

Imagine a child at eight being sexually abused by a family member. Now think of the brain capacity of that child. The perpetrator will do everything in their power to manipulate that child into believing that it's their fault. 

They use threats of physical harm towards the child or someone they love. That child is traumatized. So, when you make statements like that, think before you speak. Once you are abused in that manner, they have ripped your childhood from you. It’s the epitome of a murder. 

If there is no statute of limitations on murder then why is there one for child sexual abuse/rape? They killed a part of us we can never get back. It’s so easy for someone to say what they would have done in our position, but you don’t really get over abuse. 

You can work on healing and yes, you can move forward, but the memory of the abuse will always be there. Unfortunately, it's hard to even tell someone about it, let alone to be believed. It is a very painful process. 

Most survivors may never reveal what happened to them because of shame and embarrassment. With lack of support, child sexual abuse causes issues such as dissociation; when you mentally disconnect from the trauma to protect yourself. 

Self-harm is not usually intending to take one’s life, but to get away from the emotional pain of the abuse. Drug addiction, depression and PTSD are just a few additional conditions that may arise in the life of a survivor. 

Now that eight-year-old child is an adult and isn’t functioning well but decides it is time to speak their truth only to be targeted and attacked. It hurts when there is no compassion for the person who has survived such a horrific experience. They cannot deal with the pain any longer and decide to take their life. 

We as a society need to educate ourselves more on the effects of child sexual abuse.  Let us all be quick to listen and slow to speak. A kind word and a show of empathy and support goes a long way. You may just save a life. Remember, one in three girls and one in five boys will be sexually abused. 

We have a lot of healing to do.

Protect kids, all kids.